I’m tired a lot. Today is no exception. I think most parents of young children feel the same way. It’s cold here in the frigid north and that means more time indoors than is ideal for little ones with nonstop energy. Every day I’m searching my brain, our art supplies, and recently unused toys for some way to keep everyone entertained.
I want my kids to spend their time at home having fun and being creative, but often times it seems that at my core I am looking for an escape. I want them to build a fort together so I can just go sit and drink my coffee. I want them to paint pictures for Grandma and Grandpa because I know my in-laws would love it AND I just want to go finish the dishes in peace. I find that I spend a lot of energy trying to entertain my kids so that I can get away.
Don’t get me wrong, moms should have some time away! Kids should definitely learn to play on their own and desiring a moment of peace is more than okay. But, for me, this causes me to check my heart. I want to find peace in my day. I want to find rest for my body and my brain when I don’t know how much longer I can play hide and go seek. The heart check for me is that I need to remember that I’m here at home with my kids to bring peace, not create it. I want to bring love and rest, not try conjure up some perfect scenario where it will exist. If I am showing my kids Jesus on a daily basis, I need to remember that there is nothing I can do that will create these feelings for them and for me. What I can do is invite Jesus into everything I do, so that even in chaos I can be peace and love for my kids.
At this moment, my kids are in the next room watching tv and the baby is upstairs sleeping. I am enjoying a time of rest. But this isn’t what I am seeking all day. Instead I want to use this time of rest to connect with my Father so that I can bring His Spirit into whatever life, or kids, might throw at me for the rest of the day. Because really, that’s why I’m here.
Also, Organic India Tulsi Masala Chai is the BEST afternoon cup of tea! Just the right amount of spice and caffeine. 🙂